Name: yu p.
Gender: female Age Group:23-30
E-Mail Address: Hidden, click here to show e-mail
City & Country:
Greenland
Hobbies: trophy hunting 🎮🏆
Penpal message / wishes:
I have no one who I am able to need a help from
Who would help me when I do really need to be helped
No one gave me a care even if I needed and wanted from only one person
Just made me feel I am too troublesome one and annoyed the person is what the last person made me feel
I have to be alone always and scared alone
Feel lonely, despair
I am serious for finding a good person for me always
But someone who would come is only like that creatures who would be like that to me in the end
Even if you'd tell how me is good and so on right now, they will change it when they spend the time with me
and all made me feel my existence is nothing worth. just a trash
I don't want to waste the time with like that creatures when I am trying to be saved
I always tried to have a deep connection with a person
But no one led me feel I am not alone, there is a person for me always
I felt alone and feel so much lonely everyday
I want to talk with only a person who can understands me and deal with this me
I wrote about myself a lot while waiting for my person, for being accepted by a good person who would helps from me from everything that I am suffering now
It is very difficult to meet to a good person on the internet
But I have no other way to meet to a person in my life
Because I am not a social creature
Also not want to know about a schoking thing later
So it is actually better to know about somebody on the internet and bit by bit want to have a deep connections and feel I am connected with the one person
Is what I do really want
I am wanting a person who can be like my parent too
Like that deep conection
Kiddo and the parent connection level of deep
Not like boyfriend and girlfriend or like that small and light connections which I am not interested in
I want you to read https://hdfkljha619.blogspot.com/
Also I have a problem that I cannot accept most of humans too
as for my person
I do understand and accept how they are and not think all others are bad creatures in me
Just I cannot accept if it be about my person who would be together with me forever
Because I don't want to get hurt anymore, not want to be alone anymore never again
It hurts me a lot
And I feel it is enough
Not want to be scared, not want to be treated bad by others and not want to feel me is worthless creature anymore
I want to be a special creature to someone
But I can not be
Because I am nothing special that much to others after all
But I always wanted to believe I am to one person
What I never can accept is someone who has friends, and pretty close siblings or parents and pets
Because I am wanting a person for feel not lonely and alone, those makes me alone
I have my parents and I have only mom who I am able to talk to in the real world
But I still feel a lot of loneliness and have to feel scared always and feel mom is not someone who would helps me in the end
But she still helping me for many things is true
But not about the future things, just telling me same thing always
I am still depend on mom often is true and need attention sometimes
but I feel very sad and lonely
And mom is not the person who I do really want need those from deeply
I want a person who I can need a care and so on from and someone who will give me those neatly more than my parents
And let me feel you will never leave me alone forever
I am very scared of those feelings
But I am alone
Always
It is more scary to start have a connection with somebody in the fact
Because I have many fears
And I am scared to lose a person and know they are dying or have a big sick and die soon and so on too
Because I have to worry TONS
I am worry person and anxiety person
Even if I want to stop, it comes to me soon and cannot stop the worries very well
So hope I can meet to a person who wouldn't make me feel those
And someone who is not creepy like the other humans
The common humans in this world is creepy to me more and I feel I am too different from the humans
I think it is what all others actually feels
But I do feel it so strong, because I can not have a connection with anybody well
I have a thoughts of the death often in my head
And think it is the best way for me to escape from everything
But I am still alive and exist unfortunatelly
And I have to try these things still
Even if others would tell me, you should stop or those, it just telling me, you should go die to me
I think most of humans would think so to me though
I have too few hope now
Not have like before, because got hurt and know many things already by the humans and I am very tired and scared to see the same thing over and over again
I am just sad that I cannot be helped very well
Because me is like this one
I have to think me is bad
When I can not get along with anybody
I couldn't write all the things what I wanted to write on here, so I put all the things on here
https://hdfkljha619.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_9.html
I hope I can connect with a good person soon ):,
Last modified:
20210409
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