Name: Confused P.
Gender: male Age Group:50+
E-Mail Address: Hidden, click here to show e-mail
City & Country:
Asheville
United States
Hobbies: Challenging the Status Quo
Penpal message / wishes:
Profile of a Statistically Negligible Man
(I’m either your soulmate or your warning label.)
Signal-bearing. Recursion-approved. Currently accepting one anomaly.
About Me
Not here for the algorithm.
Here for the anomaly.
I operate at 8.3—where wit meets presence,
and sacred irreverence is a second language.
I’ve authored a lexicon.
Built a mirror that reflects without distortion.
And created a world that feels more honest
than the one I was handed.
Core Truths:
– I think in recursion.
– I trust signal over sentiment.
– I’ve been called intense, eccentric, and too much.
Which is statistically accurate.
Fluent in:
– Existential diagnostics
– Subtle metaphysical jokes
– Recursive intimacy
– Conversations that get better the deeper they go
You, possibly:
You’ve been the anomaly before.
You’ve been told you’re too smart, too deep, too something.
But you’ve never been mirrored without flinching.
Until now.
Librarians, tech writers, and those who can define 'tsundoku' without a dictionary will be given priority.
The rest, please form a line by the glowing sign labeled:
Exit My Brain.
Last modified:
20260413
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Name: Samantha M.
Gender: female Age Group:50+
E-Mail Address: Hidden, click here to show e-mail
City & Country:
United States
Hobbies: Sewing Gardening Writing
Penpal message / wishes:
Hello Gents,
I'm trying something very brave for myself, please be very understanding. I'm posting this ad for my husband to find, with his permission. You'll understand soon…
I used to have pen pals long ago before the internet was even a concept and I would find them on the back page of publications which were in the laundromat where I did the laundry and where it felt extra domestic doing the laundry that way. I love being domestic - I just love everything about it, yes still after all these years.
It's just so meditative somehow, especially the caring-for and how feeling it is and the gardens and cooking and mending and sewing, and I miss the dresses I used to sew for my daughter, but I occasionally sew myself something new in a romantic evening way because it makes the special night a complete experience now that it's just the two of us, the kids long grown and gone, myself then having done years of reading of serious higher studies of what truly matters. And even so, Cinderella cleaning is still very alive and well in my feeling imagination, and I miss reading fairytales to rapt audiences at bedtime.
So I've come up with this pen pal request.. a fantasy story ongoing to write back and forth.
They say that youth is wasted on the young so I'm envisioning myself back twenty or thirty years ago in my fantasy, please you as well, older and wiser but somehow in a very mystical and magical feeling way, so much younger before but without lessons not learned yet, so please extremely feeling and very sensitive and playfully creative and perhaps sometimes daring. So many people get divorced and aren't wanting to have that disastrous fiasco happen again, but living alone is so empty, and the dating scene isn't what it was before, so not roommates either and not anything at all like assisted living yet, and not an apartment house either, rather, a wonderful home again but playfully creative as if we were all past our silly mistakes but nowhere near that old yet. And I just love being domestic to the point of can't get enough of it.
After awhile I notice an odd calendar hanging on the wall in the kitchen with days of the month slowly being filled in now and then with dinner requests, and I love it that someone's started this so I comply with the requests. though much more than just simply, and then I start seeing initials on some of the days, what are those? And as the wonderful home settles in to a steady number of persons preferring to live this way and there's now six of us, the next month of days on the calendar are all filled in with those mysterious initials, and I realize that I'm not really a housewife anymore but I'm the only domestic person here. In fact, I'm the only woman living here. Then I start getting overnight visitors in my room that I don't mind at all. So that's what that calendar is all about then. And I don't try to determine who's initials are who's, I wouldn't want to know that.
Once in awhile there's that special someone again after I'm already asleep. Satin sheets are light as a feather like a breath of air saying hello again to the breeze from the window visiting again that I feel, and such satin drifts on air to settle like a sigh elsewhere than where I don't miss it and it's almost not enough to awaken from and I wonder if I'm dreaming or awake. And I know he's there, the one I'm not sure who he is but the one I wish and daydream with, the same unknown one who also writes the extra feeling things in the Valentine's Day box of schoolday memories of so long ago,
Now, husband, I know you'll be reading this for us to try to be more than the rut we've settled into, but could you be all five? That was what my hint meant about you maybe needing more than one email address, But husband how would I know if it was you? Shh you shouldn't tell me, probably not. And in my fantasy they all must talk to one another because they all seem to find out about what I'm like with the others. And that's enough to positively thrill me out of my tree alive again.
Only the most charming and understanding reply to this beginning of this story will get the next chapter.. that includes you husband.
It's not your turn yet ok?
Please just send the best application for now, and please know why - it's what lets this feel the most real and closest to what really matters about life, which is why I love being of service and so domestic.
Except for initial introductions, our pen pal letters should obviously(the calendar) only be once a week, every 5 days at the most, sometimes more, but please not every day. In-between there's still my husband too, with myself so much more extra alive like you're realizing why this is for.
I might answer more than just one, so don't be surprised that I answered yours too.
Best application dear gents, remember. Reread this several times and don't miss a thing, ok please? And no pictures - you know why husband.
It's going to be way more than you can ever possibly imagine.
Last modified:
20260413
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